Monday, 18 May 2009

Patchin' It All Up...

Saw another ad today for the mysterious Pink Patch and it made me sigh and shake my head in world-weary despair, like Clint Eastwood might if he wasn't so busy taking down the 'hood and feasting on the inspirational carcass of Mandela's oft-regaled story (Actually, Mandela's a bad-ass, so he can get as many bio-pics as Hollywood sees fit). Googling "pink patch" gives you a link to their website, and a long list of questioning "what the hell is this thing?" posts on various forums and blogs.

Consensus amongst those who haven't tried it is that it's a messy marketing ploy designed to prey on insecurities by parading an advert of a hawt bikini bod adorned with her trusty pink patch (totally necessary for those svelte curves, of course). It's been called sinister by the BBC, and with fair cause; targeting the youth as they so shamelessly do (endless MSN, Facebook and Myspace ads all bear the mark of a teen target audience) just compounds the fact that they are offering a product said to give reliable, healthy results in no time at all, without actually going out of their way to tell us how it all works.

The information is there, however; and the ingredients list, once found, does show promising signs of an actual product under all the gloss and spectacle. The underlying concept is eat less, lose weight (makes sense), and the patch will help you by curbing your raging appetite with its magical chemicals. So for the obese ones in the crowd, it could probably help shed a few pounds here and there (being a metric enthusiast, I don't really know how much a pound is, but I hear it's enough to warrant losing), but if you're looking to get a beach body, this is probably not the ticket. Pink Patch won't tell you as much, but it makes sense; fruit n' veg always win out in the end.

So yeah, not really sure where this post came from, but it's here nonetheless. This is why I don't have any readers. If you're there, stick with that fat 'til something a little more clear cut comes along. Besides, you probably look great; maybe even better than me.

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